Reply to Divorced People: What age were your kids when you divorced? Impact?

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Reply to "Divorced People: What age were your kids when you divorced? Impact?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I do not have personal experience with this in my family, but I can say that as a college professor I have seen how parental divorce affects my students ranging from 18 to grad school and it can be very sad and have huge impacts. I think it is largely true that it depends on the specific situation and specific kid but I also think it's a significant misconception to say "wait until they're out of the house and it's going to be easier." I actually think many kids would do better to have a year to acclimate before being blindsided that their home "wasn't real" and they can never come back. [/quote] I have a 20-year-old and can confirm that it is NOT easier with an older child. And in some ways it's worse. My stbx is acting as if our kid is a full blown adult, which they are not. And until our kid is done with college, at a minimum, there's still a lot to communicate about and that is NOT GOING WELL AT ALL. (My stbx filed for divorce and has basically gone AWOL - doesn't answer me, doesn't answer our kid's texts. It's really appalling.)  My kid is coming home tomorrow for the first time since learning we are divorcing. It's going to be a rough few days. And much worse because ours is an only child so no siblings to turn to to say "Dad and Mom are being crazy." I'm trying not to be crazy, stbx is behaving like a teenager and our kid is stuck in the middle.[/quote]

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