Reply to ASD and Empty Nesting-Accepting the Relationship With Your Child is Not the One You Wanted

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This could be schizophrenia. My sister acted very similarly and ended up being diagnosed in college. I also have autism in my family so there might be a genetic link. [/quote]

There are lots of comorbidities with ASD I folks. The ASD folks in my life I have had to emotionally detach from my HFA spouse and HFA daughter. It is very hard. But they will never have “normal” behaviors or empathy to life events or people. They just copy or mimic, if they feel up to it. But they’re often overwhelmed by life and in shutdown mode, so do not put any effort in to relationships or life or interests.

Try not to close doors but also don’t get stuck or lose YOUR sense of self.

Having an HFA adult child in college is a win. Take it one day at a time. I’ve found their lives are quite precarious- in a relationship, blow it up; have a job, say something crazy and are fired; getting good grades here but terrible grades and gave up there. [/quote]

OP here. Thank you. It hurts to hear someone say I’m narcissistic. Not that I can never be. I’m not perfect. My dad is on the spectrum. Didn’t realize it as a kid and couldn’t understand why he was so cold, hated to be touched, never understood why emotions were important to anyone. We had a very rocky relationship and I really hated him. My parents were very unhappy because my mother felt unloved. Eventually week Asperger’s became more well known I finally realized why he was as he was and since then although I would not say we are close, I have compassion for him. Still, I grieved our relationship for a long time. I guess I look ahead and am afraid I will have to do the same thing with my child. My dad is in my life. It just will never be any kind of normal father/daughter relationship. [/quote]

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