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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm sorry.  I have felt this way a lot over the past couple of years.  I am lucky in that I do have some people who really care about me and my kids, but fewer than I thought I "should".  [b]I thought I was building community here and really I wasn't. [/b] For me, this disappointment has me feeling much more apathetic about national and global events, including elections.  If hardly anyone cares about me, why should I care about them?[/quote]

The problem with “building community” is that most people want the same few spots, and won’t be satisfied with “just being included” after a certain point. I’ve been on both sides, btw.[/quote]

This is because most "communities" are just large cliques with social hierarchies, and the vast majority of people in the community are meant to provide support for the people at the top of the hierarchy, but then deal with their own problems without support. Of course everyone wants the "spots" at the top of the hierarchy-- otherwise you are being exploited.

In actual, no scare quote community (rare but does exist through certain religious communities, immigrant communities, etc.) there is a moral imperative to help even the least popular and well liked members. It's more common in religious groups because of the sense of morality being imposed.

Of course people are upset when they think (and have been told) they are part of a community, and then realize those people only care about them insofar as they are giving support and never if they are asking to receive it. It's an inherently bad system that takes advantage of people.[/quote]

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