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Reply to "Teens bedroom is a health hazard but teen won't clean it. CPS breathing down my neck. Wtd?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It may be a helpful reframe for you to accept that it’s not that she is not fix this - she can’t. She is not capable. It’s sad and awful and likely true. [/quote]

She may not be able to fix it, but she can prevent her mother from changing the status quo. That is within her power. It doesn't make her a bad kid -- there are a lot of reasons this might pan out that way -- but she can block her mother from changing what is happening, and that can really limit the possible outcomes.[/quote]

OP could lose her job and custody of 3 other kids. OP you have to triage. [/quote]

I'm unclear -- are you quoting me because you think you are disagreeing with me?[/quote]

No, I agree with you.

It is most likely that DD will continue to derail attempts to change the status quo for the foreseeable future. Past is prologue, especially when there is likely mental illness or addiction in play. Now that the family is "in the system" OP needs to take that power back and protect the other kids. DD has a father, she wants to go live with the father, seems best at least in the short term if he agrees. [/quote]

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