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College and University Discussion
Reply to "Setting expectations in college "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If the GPA drops below a 3.0 for one semester, I’m not paying for the next one. It worked for me.[/quote] Wow, if that were the case my daughter now would have $30,000 worth of extra debt because she had one semester that was under the three-point. Oh but she now is about to graduate with 3.6. Seems a bit harsh. Perhaps you could do what I did which was to help her find tutors, got her some support medically, as she has ADHD, and just tried to help her through it rather than punishing her for something she was already upset about herself.[/quote] Requiring your legally an adult dependent offspring to maintain a 3.0 GPA in order for mom and dad to foot their bills is far less intrusive and more likely to create independent, self functioning adults than managing your adult offspring's adhd, finding tutors, etc.[/quote] well that might be how your raise your kids, but it's not how I did. Obviously if she was partying all the time and not trying, then I'd have another conversation with her. In fact, we sat down (like adults) and she proatively told me the issues she was having and how she'd like to fix them. I paid for a nominal amount for her to get a tutor, which she did find on her own. We talked about the classes she liked and the ones she struggled with and talked through potential change of major, and what kind of career she could pursue if she changed her major. Like adults. My point is that threats do not cause anything but resentment. Sitting down and allowing your college student to identify what went wrong, and be proactive in discussing it with you, is going to be much more productive in the end. I passed no judgement, and the only advice I gave her was that I didn't think the classes she was taking spoke to her strengths, and that her desired career path may not either. She agreed and now has an entirely different life goal than she had coming into school. She is very proud of how she was able to right the ship and be succesful. I just cannot fathom adding $30K in debt to her (when we had the money saved in her 529) because she had a tough time adjusting to college, chose the wrong major and had an undiagnosed medical condition. She finished freshman year with a 2.7, and again is at a 3.6 now. In our case, it also turned out she had undiagnosed ADHD. I recommended she see a doc that summer and she was diagnosed. Accomodations and meds have helped tremendously. If you're saying that I'm not successfully raising an adult, you have gone some major issues.[/quote]
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