Reply to Why people don't get along with their in-laws?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]They are NOT my family. I am friendly and kind but would not force more interaction with hem than DH wants and definitely will NOT take over holiday gifts buying, schedule negotiation and all correspondence. No way in hell

Just like kids get married. I don't plan to deal with my son and daughter-in-law.... I plan to deal with my children. I also don't plan to bring me in-laws and relationship I have with my children. [/quote]

DP here.  I find that sad, because I have been part of families that treat significant others as family - everyone is included, not just those who want to be only children (or MIL/FIL favorites). [/quote]

DP.  I don't want to be treated as 'family' by my ILs.  They are emotionally manipulative, have internalized misogyny, are judgmental and don't recogize what great people their kids are.  If they were members of my family of origin, I would call them out and be very explicit about behaviors that I had issues with.  I have, however, deferrred to DH's wishes not to do that.  I keep them at arms length.

Is that 'sad'?  Sure. True 'family' is supportive and healthy. When we're adults, we get to choose who our families are. [/quote]

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