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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sadly, it’s too late for you but when I was dating my DH I really got to know his large family. His parents were very loving and happy, his siblings were all smart and heading in good directions. It really helped that I was quickly embraced by the family and that really helped me know that he was the one. Looking at the broader gene pool can be very helpful. [/quote]

I had the same impression of DH's family when I met them also.  All very smart, successful, nice, down to earth.  DH had only very vaguely mentioned that one of his siblings went through a tough time in high school years, but never divulged the full story.  I didn't start seeing the layers come off until we got engaged.  Then, I got to see MIL's issues, front and center who tried to get me really enmeshed with her.  And then the wheels really started coming off right around the time DH and I were expecting our first child.  His one sibling filed for divorce, had an emotional breakdown, attempted suicide, and then was admitted into an inpatient unit, and I was asked to attend family counseling with them when everything started being revealed.  Shortly after, the other sibling almost died while drinking, was sent to rehab, and then a few years after, attempted suicide. [/quote]

To add more context - we still have good relations with everyone in DH's family and see them.  One of the siblings was estranged for a while from the rest of the family, except us.  And now is only estranged from the other sibling.  Otherwise, we all still see each other during the holidays, and have good relationships.  DH's 2 siblings are in a good place right now.  Just a rough road to get there. [/quote]

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