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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]When I read these kinds of threads, I always wonder about the time when you first started dating. Were these guys living in their parent’s basement or on their own? If on their own, was their apartment relatively clean and were their bills paid? Once married, did you make their life too easy and now they are in lazy mode? How did your situation start?[/quote]

I’m confused by your confusion.  They mask.  All crappy partners “mask.”  Alcoholics, addicts, rage-aholics, sex addicts, and perennial losers.  They keep it together for as long as they need to and once they feel comfortable, the real them comes out.[/quote]
No one can “mask” being a loser. That would require high sociopathic intelligence and willful deception. If he’s a failure to launch bum, he is almost certainly not that smart or sophisticated.

The whole thing about failure to launch is it is immediately visible, ie. still living in mom’s basement, holding down menial jobs etc. (NOT being a GS 14, wth?)[/quote]

All the failure to launch types I know failed to launch because they never had to. Either extremely wealthy or enabled by parents who could support them. They are smart, well-read, well-traveled, well-educated, own homes and usually work at something in a casual way that doesn't bring in much money. 
I should know, since I'm one of them. [/quote]

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