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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. Thanks for all of the helpful responses and suggestions. We do want to make this work because, as others have noted, this is DH’s brother! For reasons I won’t get into, the only family DH has is his parents and his brother, plus some distant cousins who almost certainly won’t come. So our (or even my) absence from the events would be significant, and we want to be as present as possible.[/quote]

I understand your and DH's desire to be there for your BIL, but not at the expense of your own family's comfort (financial and physical) and sanity. And what most of us are saying is, this couple's multi day plans are excessive. You're BIL's family, not indentured servants. There has to be some give and take and some flexibility.

Also, will the couple be expecting a lot of their friends? Does the bride have a huge family? I still do not understand why it's so critical that you AND your DH be there for all these events as if there won't be many others? And if it's a small crowd why so many events in the first place?![/quote]

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