Reply to He ordered WHAT?!? A lonely yawp to my pocket friends about my pathetic marriage

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So you still have sex together? If not, which of one you rejected sex first? [/quote]

OP here.  Fair question.  We technically have had sex a handful of yikes in the past couple of years, but I know my definition that would qualify as a “sexless” marriage.

He’s always had a lower sex drive than me but it drastically, drastically went down after the wedding.  Like nearly immediately after.  I initiated 9 times out of 10 and was rejected maybe 7 or 8 of those 9 times for the first year, then we had a kid and it just stayed that low and has been that way for years.  Interestingly the last few years he has initiated much more (as in, a few times a year) but he’s now very crude about it, nothing like actually being physically affection in general and then building up to it.  He’s also picked a lot of fights for years and been very argumentative, veering from picking fights to the silent treatment when I engage and actually make a point, so when he started to initiate a couple of years back, I just wasn’t feeling it at all.  Plus, menopause.  I accept out of obligation sometimes and to not hurt his feelings, or hoping it will improve his mood.  But a decade of rejection leaves me with little enthusiasm.  [/quote]

The PP who said gay/trans is looking pretty smart now. [/quote]

DP. It's so very DCUM to jump to the assumption that any man who says he's straight, but who doesn't want much sex, simply [i]must[/i] be gay or trans. It's as if some people here cannot possibly believe a straight man could be less than rampantly interested in sex all the time. And before you say the lingerie must mean he's trans, well, it could, but it ain't necessarily so. A lot of assumptions going on there, none of which helps the OP anyway. 
[/quote]

I mean, sure, he might totally be a straight, cisgender guy. But there are a ton of clues here to be considered. He sounds like he hates his appearance. He has had low libido since Day 1 and they are now sexless. And there is some strong evidence that he enjoys wearing women’s lingerie. So yes, he may not be gay/transgender/etc. But there is a much higher likelihood that he is than a husband who likes to have sex 1-3 times a week with his wife and has shown no signs of wearing women’s lingerie. She can do whatever she wants with these clues.
But it would be silly to think that his sexuality/gender might not be what she thought it was.

I mean, if I found 12 empty liquor bottles stashed around my yard, there could be many explanations. But, I might want to check into whether my husband was secretly drinking. I mean, sure, maybe some teenagers used my backyard for a party. But I would absolutely be talking to my husband.[/quote]

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