Reply to Women with high powered careers

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Women with high powered careers"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You’re asking specifically about relationships, so maybe this comment is irrelevant, but I think some of the other trade-offs of a “big” career + family are wrongly ignored.  Things like sleep, exercise, stress management.  Some people can handle more stress than others, absolutely, but SO many high-powered people and women especially run themselves ragged, at times to the point of illness.

Ultimately, you have to prioritize relationships.  You can’t work long hours and spend sufficient time with kids AND spouse AND friends AND other family, not typically.  But people have different needs on those fronts, too - it comes down to what you value.[/quote]

I’m a guy and I agree 1000 percent.  When I was in Biglaw I always chafed at the men and women with kids who for some reason thought they were entitled to special consideration over the single or childless simply because they had kids.  WTF?  Single and childless folks are entitled to have a life too.

I’ll never understand people who prioritize work over a personal life of any kind.  I think it’s really sad.  [/quote]
Also a guy, and I noticed this during my days as a young, single consultant. The unwritten rule was that everybody had to stay late, except this one guy who had a young kid left every day at 5...and the rest of us were fine with that. But I suppose if any of us complained it would affect our performance review, which was a cutthroat competition to see who could be the best team player. Man am I glad I left that life behind.[/quote]

I’ve been that person who had to leave at 5:30 every day when most people were there until 8pm or later (ironically it was during a child psychiatry fellowship).

Daycare closed at 6pm.  We didn’t live near other family.  My husband was in a surgery residency and couldn’t be counted on.

It wasn’t great, and it didn’t feel great.  It’s not like the unwritten rules didn’t apply to me.  It was that I wasn’t following them.  I knew that people were annoyed with me.

Meanwhile, I was working really hard to make sure I was good at my job, then going home and doing housework, getting up with a baby at night, taking limited time for maternity leave, taking no vacation, and coming in sick because I had to take off when my child was sick.  It sucked to work so hard and yer to be treated like a slacker.

I coached high school rowing when I was in medical school, and I get having meaningful hobbies outside of work.  Having kids is completely different though.  It’s really, really not fair to compare the two.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics