Reply to DH’s therapist refused to talk to our marriage therapist

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What is there to coordinate, though? Marriage therapy uses a different muscle, and has a different focus, than individual therapy. I wouldn’t necessarily think to have a marriage counselor consult with my individual therapist. I imagine you have specific circumstances that makes it more of a necessity? [/quote]

Interdisciplinary healthcare is standard of practice.  I don’t even consider couples therapy and individual therapy different disciplines, so this example is even more egregious; imagine if, say, someone’s PCP refused to talk to their ophthalmologist because it’s their “policy.”  This situation is no different.  As a therapist (I’m the psychologist PP), you’re darn right I want information from other healthcare professionals treating my patients, if there’s consent.  It only improves my care - I’m one person and I only see this person in one context.  When I worked inpatient, we had interdisciplinary rounds daily and at every single one of those, someone in one discipline, e.g., occupational therapy, shared information that a healthcare provider in a different discipline, e.g., psychiatry, hadn’t known about the patient and which was *relevant to their care*.  Refusing to talk to any other healthcare professionals about anything is unethical care.  [/quote]

DP, not the OP, but: Thank you for posting here and pointing out the importance of healthcare professionals actually communicating with each other! I think some PPs are agitated about some idea of "a therapist must never tell the spouse/another therapist anything, ever" but they are not seeing therapy as [i]healthcare[/i] in the way you can. It really is not uncommon for this type of sharing to take place, despite what some PPs insist. Sadly for OP and the marriage, it sounds as if the DH and his therapist are going to be a united front against any sharing. [/quote]
It is his individual therapy. He trusts this therapist and does not want any part of what they discuss shared with the marriage therapist. This is an individual's life and issues being worked through in therapy. He may have things in his childhood that he never shared anywhere except with the therapist. Perhaps his trust issues are too acute right now. You don't know what he's struggling with. Op, if his not sharing personal information from therapy -even broad strokes- is a dealbreaker, then walk away. Your relationship may not survive if he manages to heal from whatever it is that led him into therapy in the first place.[/quote]

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