Reply to Feeling hurt when other people fall apart over their elderly ailing parents while mine died young

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[quote=Anonymous]Losing loved ones is difficult no matter how old you are. It’s different when they die young and unexpectedly than when they die old after a long illness and you knew death was imminent, for sure. But it’s still hard no matter what. I am sure nothing compares to losing your parents and I am very lucky my parents are still living so I don’t know how that feels. But I have experienced a lot of loss. I lost my lifelong best friend when we were very young (21). She died very suddenly and unexpectedly. A few years later I lost another close friend at age 25, also very suddenly and unexpectedly. Then the following year I lost a cousin I was very close to—she was almost 30 years older than I am and was like a surrogate parent/close aunt to me growing up. She died after a year long battle w cancer so we knew it was coming but she was only 53 so very young. Then that same year my grandfather who I was very close to died at age 88 after having dementia for years. ALL of those deaths were very difficult. No matter how old the person is, no matter if they were sick and I knew they would probably die soon or if their death completely shocked me, it was all traumatic and painful and sad. Each time.

I am very sorry that you lost your parents young. That’s horrible and it’s not fair. But going through the loss of a loved one is always hard. Grief is not a competition.[/quote]

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