Reply to Feeling hurt when other people fall apart over their elderly ailing parents while mine died young

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[quote=Anonymous]I am also an only child.

Is it possible that you are revisiting the grief of your parents’ deaths because your husband is navigating this life event with siblings and support you didn’t have? Or that he is navigating it with the wisdom and life experience of a person in their 50s instead of as a 30yr old whose friends can’t possibly understand?

More cynically - how much do you identify as an orphan? Is it one of your “Top 3 descriptors” - Mom, Wife, Orphan? Or even “orphan, wife, mom”? Ask yourself (or a friend you trust) honestly how often you bring up your orphan status in daily life and what kind of sympathy or support you receive. 
Is it possible you at at an age where more and more friends and acquaintances are becoming orphans as well? In your 60s and 70s it will almost be assumed you have no living parents. If being an orphan a core part of your identity, are you mourning the loss of your special status or jealous that other people currently actively losing parents are getting more attention than you? [/quote]

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