Reply to Nonstop fighting at Thanksgiving, how do I make it stop?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]If you are a guest in their home, you’re accepting who and how they are.[/b] If you can’t accept that, you need to either stay in a hotel, or host yourself so that you are on your own turf.

If you choose to visit their chaotic environment, just be prepared for KNOWN factors. Have a stash of your own food, have things to keep your kids entertained—so that when dinner is late or incomplete, you are at least fed and occupied.

Mess, so what. It’s not your mess, it’s a few days. Go out as much as you can, even if you have to make up errands like needing a pharmacy item. Why make a cup of tea in their house when you can go buy a magazine, get a Starbucks and enjoy 20 minutes of peace in the parking lot?

If they ask rude questions, say you’re not discussing that with them. If they make a rude comment, say “That’s not polite” and then move on. You don’t have to take it, but don’t try to change them or go deep about it. Just refuse to engage and keep it moving.[/quote]

Um, no. Parents are rude with the judgment and intrusive questions. I'd just ignore those and not answer. Steer to other topics. And tell them they are being rude. Then shorten the visits.

You say they're wonderful grandparents. And maybe they are now. But that sort of thing will eventually spill over to your kids.[/quote]

Wowwwwww, maybe read the full post before you highlight one line and act like you're bringing insight. Here's what I wrote at the END of my post that you conveniently skipped over:
[b]If they ask rude questions, say you’re not discussing that with them. If they make a rude comment, say “That’s not polite” and then move on. You don’t have to take it, but don’t try to change them or go deep about it. Just refuse to engage and keep it moving.[/b][/quote]

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