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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I get your frustration. My parents raised us to be frugal and self reliant, and they embodied those traits perfectly. They would be abhorred by any parent who behaved the way your ILs did. It's hard to swallow that your ILs have been living lavishly while counting on your DH and you when the money runs out. I'm glad that your DH seems to have a handle on things and that it may not be as bad as your first anticipated it. [/quote]
I agree with everything in this post except that they lived lavishly because they expected their son to bail them out. They may not have expected to live much beyond 80, but also, I think there was some magical thinking going on. I think they convinced themselves that everything would just work out and that it wasn’t time to start cutting back yet — not because they were okay with their son supporting them, but just out of misplaced confidence that because they’d always had plenty of money, they always will.

It is sickening that they squandered a $2 million inheritance. At the time of my beloved grandmother’s death, she was holding onto land worth a few hundred thousand dollars. She wouldn’t sell it to live more comfortably because it had always been my grandparents’ dream to leave an inheritance for their 4 children. Grandma died with her modest home paid off, but less than $1,000 in her bank account. It pains me to think about her living on the razor’s edge so that her children could inherit as much as possible.

If I inherit anything from my parents’ estate, that money will be treated with reverence commensurate with the work and sacrifice that went into building some wealth. No fancy vacations unless I can afford them without the inheritance. My top priority is ensuring that I’m not ever a burden on my children. I hope my children will inherit something from me. I’m not going to live like a pauper to maximize their inheritance, but I’m more of a saver than a spender by nature.[/quote]

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