Reply to Can step-parents ever really love and prioritize kids the way parents do?

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Reply to "Can step-parents ever really love and prioritize kids the way parents do?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - didn't realize this had been moved.  I wasn't envisioning that a step-parent should have to act exactly like a a parent, I understand its a different role.  But I'd imagine their lives are still hugely impacted.

I'd just been thinking about for all the conflict with DH, at least we both at our core want what's best for our kids as a top priority.  I can't imagine being married to someone who wasn't my (3 very young) kids' dad and having to negotiate with them on whether paying for xyz therapy was worth it or them be resentful that i needed to go to bed early b/c the 3yo has sleep issues and just letting him cry it out won't fix it or that I don't think some random nanny can manage them all 3 for a week for us to go on an adults only vacation.

Basically, all the things that I used to think were totally fine and doable and reasonable before I was a parent and could see (and emotionally feel) how not straight forward all these was even if they'd be "fine".  It seems very stressful to try to expect someone to accept all these things as a parent when they're not in the role of parent (widow where new husband is only dad etc)[/quote]

You rise to the occasion, and they could to.

It is not a function of having spent time in your uterus. They never opens time in your husband’s uterus. Your premise is so off.

Yes, if you meet an older child, or one whose needs are largely met by someone else…you may not grow as close. But if course, stepparents can live and sacrifice as much/well as those who share DNA.

Lots if bio parents are selfish and damaging. You are focusing on the wrong question.

(And if your kids are growing up in a house full of tension and where the man and women feel no love for each other…think about how bad that is for them to see and learn from. )

[/quote]

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