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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]my youngest is just 18 months[/quote]

Ok that being the case - maybe you do need some help. Try and get in with a therapist and consider meds. This is to make you feel better and has nothing to do with your DH.

Then, yes, you can find someone else after 40 and it is pretty certain they too will have kids. So now you will be supporting a new DH who is also supporting some kids so in that sense, unless he is also a high income earner and the fact that he is paying support doesn't eat into your budget too much, then you will be ok, otherwise, now you are in the same position. It is also likely you will try and have a kid together.

It's not like getting a divorce and remarrying will make your situation better bc the bottom line will still be the same.

Your kids are young. They will get older. Both you and your DH will have more time for yourselves. The dynamics will change.  [/quote]

This OP. Your husband being a dead weight has nothing to do with YOUR value. If you would rather be married than alone, you are probably better off making a mental adjustment in the situation you are in than being a single mother and sole support to three children including an infant. I would completely take the idea of divorce off the table and free your mind from that conflict. Work on improving other areas of your life. Lots can get better that is in your control: you can make new friends, get a raise, your kids will get older. If you have enough money to divorce then instead buy a country house and spend time there with the older kids alone. Leave the baby with DH for long weekends. He will drop the "open marriage" idea mighty fast![/quote]

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