Reply to Cruel Break-Up

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, the things that your ex said to you were abusive and inexcusable. Even if he were miserable, he had myriad ways of saying “It’s not working out for me” and stepping away. The fact that this abuse was delivered after a lovely night out on a day that was special to you means that the delivery was *designed* to be hurtful. As your title says, it was cruel.

What is important is to develop self esteem and not to tolerate abuse. Your instinct, to ask what you did/how you could have been better, only works when both parties are good-faith actors who want to work things out. The best response to someone abusive is to get out of the car, calmly say “I don’t want to hear from you again, and to Uber home.” Nothing you said or did could change the actions of your creepy ex, despite what he wanted you to believe. He is responsible for his own behavior, not you.

On a related note, you might want to do some reading about manipulative people and codependency. It may help you to better understand the dynamic you just lived through. I hope you will believe in yourself more and understand that you are better than staying in relationships with someone like this. [/quote]

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