Reply to For those of you whose husbands work long hours...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The demands of a big law young associate and a big law partner are different.  Partners have a lot more control over their schedules and typically (though not always) work less (still a lot, but less than junior associates). Associates often (though not always) have pretty minimal control and grind out a lot of hours.  Agreed that this is going to depend on the firm, practice, clients, and partner(s).  I point this out because while all of this advice and perspective is good and helpful, some of it just won't work as well for a big law junior associate.  Just by way of example with the family dinner, if I routinely left before 7pm in the first 2 years at a law firm, I believe I would have been let go.  I'm not sure I would have felt comfortable doing this for a few years, other than on Fridays.

Another thing to keep in mind OP is that, unfortunately, the employability of a junior attorney is not great.  So, if your husband has only been practicing for a short time, it might be very difficult for him to get a different job.

I realize this is not a comment full of helpful advice, but perhaps this could be helpful perspective.  [/quote]

I mentioned family dinner, but I wasn’t suggesting that OP insist on family dinners. I didn’t do that until the kids could actually participate in family dinners.

It can be really hard for people to see other options when they are in the grind of a well-paying job. It eats away at your ability to gain perspective and it feels like you have no choice. This is why some firms have gotten rid of the option to take a sabbatical. Once you have a minute to see another life outside of big law, you often don’t want to go back. [/quote]

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