Reply to How did you not kill each other during the baby years?!

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People have different focuses.  I think when everyone has plenty of sleep and plenty of time, everything gets done.  When the sleep and the time get limited, people start to crack a little.  My SO would do dumb shit.  Like in your example, he would only do the yard work. [b] I hadn’t slept more than 3 hours in a row in months (due to bf)[/b] and you want a cookie and a pat on the back because the yard looks good?  How about, I don’t know, watching your kid so I can consistently shower or take a walk alone or whatever.[/quote]

Ok but that’s your choice.  I think a lot of the pain of having young kids is self inflicted.  There are so many moms who Moll themselves breastfeeding and don’t sleep train. Did your DH ask you to wake up every 3 hours to feed your kid?  I doubt it.  So it’s kind of silly to judge him.  I don’t want a miserable life so I don’t breastfeed and I sleep train at a young age.  [/quote]

I hate women like you. I really do. [/quote]

Why?  If anything you should be hating on the women who breastfeed, stay up on all night, and then complain about it.  [/quote]

See my post below and realize how much hatred you have towards women. Or women who dont act like  "men". Im sure if you could pay someone to have your children for you, you would, which is fine, but the end result here is you placing perceived burdens on someone else so that you dont have to carry them- literally and figuratively. [/quote]

You sound angry that I’m well rested and am not a martyr.  [/quote]

Im angry because you obviously dont like women- you only like men or women like you.  It would be fine if you gave suggestions to support OP with choices for the decisions she is making (choosing to breastfeed and/or not sleep train) but INSTEAD of that you are promoting YOUR choices. She is asking for 2 things: 1)acknowledgement that this phase is difficult and 2) that couples struggle with adapting to the phase of having children and all of the new needs that come with it

Your response is to blame her and tell her that her choices are making it difficult. To you there is only be like a man or be a martyr. Women=martyr.

OP- I apologize for hacking this thread but I hate seeing comments that are not supportive and other women blaming breastfeeding or not sleep training for why childrearing and the transition into parenting is difficult.

There are great suggestions here regarding list making, splitting of night duties, outsourcing, etc. Please know you are not alone. These first 6-12 months are difficult (REGARDLESS OF THE PERSONAL CHOICES YOU MAKE). [/quote]

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