Reply to For those well-meaning social workers

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I lived through a similar situation with my parents and it almost ruined my own health. I really think that the government needs to help elderly people who are sick and broke. The resources of a family are rarely enough to care for sick, aging parents. Other countries take better care of elderly through government resources, the US is failing the elderly. [/quote]

That’s what social security is for. Granted for many it’s insufficient to maintain the lifestyle that they want. But the government does provide aid. [/quote]
Money isn't the only thing that elderly people need. My parents are very well-off financially, but I worry about their ability to take care of themselves physically and maintain their home. [/quote]

Posting again. I so relate to this as well. If you are not health POA or financial POA it is not your issue. You simply make it the problem of the person who is. They can hire someone to manage the home and hire people to come to the home to monitor the parents. I made myself so ill and so angry obsessing over all my parents' stupid choices and how much safer they would be elsewhere. For my mental and physical health I had to to let go. A friend of mine had 2 small strokes dealing with her crazy elderly mother. That was the final straw that made me understand they could actually outlive me if I didn't detach more. (That friend actually moved away and somehow the uninterested siblings finally stepped up).

Let go of the idea of them dying peacefully in a luxurious residential facility where they enjoyed dining and going on day trips with friends. They may die falling down the steps all alone in their home after yet another aide quit because she could not take their verbal abuse and you could not lose your job to come fill in. They could die choking on food after spending all day on the sofa watching TV and calling their adult kids to leave guilt trippy messaged. If the person made the choice of sound mind, no matter how gruesome, at least their wishes were respected. [/quote]

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