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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op - so this is a really interesting thread and I have learned a lot 
Some background - I am not from the us originally. Where I am from in Europe - is a bit of a different conversation. Some kids have challenges etc but is more of an inclusive approach where I think the aim is to less see emotional regulation issues as a ‘fault’ of the kid or parents and more as a phase that needs support
In the us it feels like there is a lot of blame placed on uneven development 
I prob will continue to see it the way I grew up and my friends back in Europe see it and prioritize all kids mental health and inclusivity. I get where people would want to draw the line at property destruction. I wouldn’t force my kid to invite everyone but I would want to encourage the part of them that has empathy and wants to include. Honestly I may be way off base here and is just an american cultural difference I need to get with [/quote]

Preschool parties are an invite everyone situation but you are talking about 15 kids, max. That is financially feasible for most families. My kids K class had 30 kids. That gets expensive fast. Kids are used to the idea that they are not invited to every party. DS had two friends leave an event that he was at to go to a party. The two kids who left were in a different class for his grade. Also, he doesn't play with the kid who was having the party. Why would he be invited? There are kids in his class that he doesn't do anything with at recess or after school or at the park. He waves hi when he sees them and that is it. Why would those kids invite him to a party?

His mental health is just fine and he doesn't exclude kids who want to play when we see them at the park or at the pool.

But you do you and judge away. [/quote]

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