Reply to Way to get past my resentment towards lazy DH, knowing he will not change?

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[quote=Anonymous]I agree with the CBT or other therapy to try to change your own emotional response.  That can help in the short term.  The long term is harder - divorce or... ???

My initial thought was surprise that with 7 days childcare, low stress jobs, and one family nearby, you still were overwhelmed.  But the special needs is an extra burden, and it sounds like none of his chores are the day-to-day grind of the evening routine (dinner/dishes/bedtime etc.).  I can see how that would get exhausting with zero help from spouse.

I have a much more engaged spouse, but before we had kids, his chores were generally not daily stuff, and if he had a rough day, he could push it to whenever felt like a good time.  Maybe our chore lists were similar, but that was a big difference in stress.  I finally said we had to alternate on dishes/kitchen, and that really solved a lot of the frustration I felt on a day to day basis.

But, I can't see your husband stepping up to do that, even if you demanded it be so.  I'm sorry. [/quote]

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