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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My wife doesn’t work but was valedictorian of her high school (toughest in her state) and had very good grades from a very competitive undergrad.  She’s always been more conscientious than competitive though and did not want to go through the law / medicine grind, which is great because it saved on tuition and she earned money working during that time and got work experience for her resume later.  I did the grind for both of us.

Super smart and a great mom (and happy to dedicate a lot of time to our three children).  I’m very lucky and it works great for our family.

I mention this to clarify the assortative mating point.  It’s real and it works, but what men are looking for in women and what women are looking for in men are not the same thing.[/quote]

What do men look for in women [/quote]

Women are more likely to want a man that is ambitious because it signals he will be a good provider.  Mediocre intellect & MBA &gt; PhD in quixotic field.

Men do want smart women but care far less about ambition.  A little bit is fine but too much isn’t great.  Someone who is smart but also thoughtful and compassionate will be better with the kids.

Yin and Yang and all that.  In theory naturally ambitious women could solve for this problem by marrying laid back men and I have no problem with that but from reading this forum that doesn’t seem to work.  But as a naturally ambitious man I am fine to both work hard and be active with my kid but my life is way easier with an ally than a competitor who is going to yell at me if I don’t do exactly 50% of the laundry folding.  I’m return I’ve earned easily 90%+ of our total income since we’ve been together (plus chores like lawn mowing, dishwashing and lots of kid time, esp. on weekends) so I’m delivering in return.[/quote]

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