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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In my 20s, I focused on my OWN salary.   I picked a major, went to grad school, in something I knew would allow me to find a good job and I'd be interested in as well.

I had no 'salary requirements' and I met my husband when he was 24 (close to 25) and I was 26.  I was making slightly more than him then.  He was smart as hell, good looking, funny, athletic and had a degree from a good university.

Over time he was making double and triple my salary (my salary is very good).  But, when we met there was no guarantee he would be such a high earner.

I picked the man, not the $.

Women should focus on earning their own $.  [/quote]

That’s fine if you plan to raise kids and support your spouse for 50+ years on whatever you can make alone. That goes for both genders. But lots of people find it difficult to manage that on one salary. Which is when resentment can start to build that your partner earns so much less. And you might begin controlling how your spouse spends since you are the one contributing much more. I saw this in my friend group. Couples having fights over groceries and toiletries when the issue is really a $30k or more pay gap. [/quote]

I see it with a spouse that has no job.  That's quite a bit more than a $30k pay gap when one brings in $0.[/quote]

Earning $0 at least you are clear that one person is not financially contributing. However, when one spouse earns 75% of the HHI, roles get murkier —especially if you had never discussed this possibility as the long term status quo.[/quote]

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