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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well, I was sexually molested by a neighbor kid when I was 5 or 6 and watched a sibling go through cancer twice in a 5 year period. My parents made lots of mistakes but I realized later that they did the best they could with what they knew and what they had. They raised kids in a very different generation and the parent-child norms that exist today did not exist then.

I am now in my mid-40s.  I am very happily married to someone I have been with for over 20 years, 2 kids, lots of friends, and a great career.  I didn't let my childhood define me and I made every effort to cultivate the life that I wanted for myself and for my kids. Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it.

For context, the rest of my siblings are dysfunctional, play the victim card, and blame my parents for everything in their life.  My sister thinks our mom is a narcissist and all of her life issues are the result of our mom.  From an outside perspective, a lot of the friction between my mom and sister is driven by the way my sister talks and treats my mom. Both of them are highly sensitive due to low self esteem, stubborn, and cannot see the world from anyone's perspective other than their own.

I can look at all the problems in my sister's life and attribute them to poor decision-making and how she responded to every adverse event in her life.

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I really hate it when people think that because they were able to overcome a challenge in a particular way that they have the right to look down and judge other people who have trauma and are still suffering with it and because of it.
Good for you but you’re doing great I think that’s wonderful but don’t claim to my using the victim card that’s just demeaning.
You can see and understand that they may be making poor choices just wish them well but don’t denigrate them.
By the way that 10% /90% is BS because that 90% that you’re talking about . what you do if nobody taught you how to do you’re going to have a hard road ahead.[/quote]

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