Reply to anyone else not planning on paying for a daughter's wedding?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Didn't even cross my mind, honestly. Now that I think about it, I decided I will not pay for anything wedding related. If she (they) need money to mount the house, I will happily help with money to buy furniture, silverware, etc. If I have money, I will also help with a down payment to the house.

I won't help with the wedding party itself because I was not raised in this culture - my parents were not married (just had a common law union - with the same rights of married people), and my own wedding was very simple - I had one of those officials come to my home, and it was just my husband, me and my MIL. Then we served cake (from Giant), Champagne and went to have dinner (along with some other relatives) at 429 (sp?), a fancy restaurant in Falls Church.

I also didn't have a prom or college graduation party or even a ceremony - I just walked in to get my diploma later. I never cared about these kind of stuff, and if my daughter turns out to care, she can pay for her own wedding party herself. I think it is a waste of money.[/quote]

[b]So you won't support anything your kids want for themselves that isn't what you would want for them? What if they have different taste in a starter house than you? Will you only pay for a downpayment on a house of which you approve[/b]?[/quote]

Of course not pp! For a house, they can choose a pink one with purple windows and huge cherry on top for all I care. I will help as much as I can with money. Also for a graduation ceremony/party, but not a wedding. She can pay for that herself - I am not rich nor I will ever be, so the money I have will go towards her house for a down payment. IF I had lots of money and it TRULY didn't make an ounce of difference if I spent 50, 100, 500k in my daughter's wedding, I would also pay for it with pleasure. I don't think it spoils, it is just not something that is in our radar as a family to make sacrifices for it.

Oh, and btw, if I had the money to pay for her wedding, it would be a GIFT and I would not try to dictate WHO or HOW many to invite, etc...  [/quote]

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