Reply to Update to "Minimal amount of secret drinking"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Right now, I would focus on getting my act together to assume I will be living alone, as the primary caregiver and breadwinner. Because that is likely where you will end up. Maybe not next month, maybe not next year, but eventually. If you get your act together and he suddenly gets serious about sobriety, you should be no worse off. [/quote]

OP here. This is one area where I'm doing okay and am set up pretty well, among the rest of the chaos. The biggest issue would be that I switched to part-time a few months ago to stay home with our daughter, and am on his health insurance. We had similar incomes when I worked full time and I would be able to ramp back up, but I really like being home with her. Obviously that would not be an option if we separated. Hopefully he gets his act together. I want to believe in him but today I am completely exhausted by all the lying.[/quote]

You need to be real. He will likely get fired at some point. You need a full time job. [/quote]
Sounds like OP can ramp up to full-time when she needs to. She may need a few weeks of remaining PT to deal with things and shore up the walls. But yeah, maybe she should speak with her supervisor about resuming FT at some point.
[/quote]

OP doesn’t have much leverage while she is unable to support herself and her daughter. Unfortunately, this exact scenario is where so many women end up staying in marriages that are unhealthy. I really doubt that he will take action unless he seriously believes that he is about to lose her and DD. And he won’t believe her threats until he sees that she is taking action to leave.[/quote]

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