Reply to Friend issue: how to deal with a copycat friend?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It would bug me. It’s like she’s eroding the uniqueness of your life by copying it. And she’s freeloading on your ideas. Don’t tell her where you bought stuff. How many times has she copied your vacation ideas?[/quote]

Yes, that’s definitely possible. I feel like any time I go anywhere, she will go there within a year. Sometimes they are kind of trendy trips, like going to Iceland, and I feel like it’s not just about me. But like I’ve been doing an annual trip to the same not trendy place for years (since before I met her) and a few years ago she started doing it too. It was really weird because it’s a place I go because it’s near where I grew up. And now it’s like a thing I share with her (even though we don’t go together) but it I don’t feel like there’s any joy in sharing it. It feels like she is competitive about it, like when it comes up she’ll ask me stuff like “oh I discovered [x restaurant] there, you should try it” and I’m like “yes, I have been going to that restaurant for actual decades.” It feels very invasive even though I try to tell myself that it’s not like I own a vacation destination! But it was kind of my thing and now it’s less unique to me, and that does bother me, I have to admit.[/quote]

Ohhhhh.  I get you now OP.

You sound like a know it all narcissist.  Nobody can tell you they like anything if you already had it before, and you have to be snarky about it.  Really, chances are nobody can share any likes/dislikes with you, because you see everything as a power struggle, win/lose rather than a basic, low key convo.

Friend:  You should try Le Pew Restaurant - we loved it

You:  I already know that restaurant, been going for decades.

[Your thought = she can't tell ME anything, I know everything, I win this competition in my head that doesn't actually exist. . .]

Normal Person Alternative:  Oh I LOVE that restaurant too, especially the pate.

[/quote]

Narcissist is accurate. The only person I know who has the same attitude as Op is a narcissist.[/quote]

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