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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Dh also asks me what I want. I wish he would think of something himself just to show he's thinking about it.

Even if it's my favorite pastry for breakfast and flowers, even if the activity for the day is my favorite hike. I wish he would just say "good morning, come downstairs for the good croissants and flowers on the table. We're going to that waterfall today!" [b]on his own without me having to lay it all out.[/b] And without me having to pack the kids lunches and snacks for the hike.

And yes, I've explained this to him and given him ideas but then he doesn't follow through. [/quote]

This this this. If I have to spell it all out and say exactly what I want (repeatedly) it doesn’t feel thoughtful on his part anyway.

I’ve been married 17 years and I tried for a long time. I’ve since given up. He’s a good partner and it just wasn’t worth the fights over my disappointment. Here is where we landed: I buy myself a splurge item or two (like shoes or certain clothing items that I’d normally deem “too expensive” to buy for no reason. And he also knows that I’m not cooking or touching a single dirty dish the entire day. And that’s it.

I also don’t do much for Father’s Day in return. He gets a card and a new shirt or something. He could buy himself a nice gift like I do for myself but he doesn’t. He usually ends up grilling out for his own parents for Father’s Day but that’s his choice. In his defense he doesn’t complain or seem bothered by it.

Oh well.[/quote]

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