Reply to your child's future wedding

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[quote=Anonymous]Why does every response to this thread have to be some version of rude?

There are a million ways to have a wedding.  Sometimes they're huge events celebrating the extended family.  Sometimes, it's five people at a courthouse.  I've seen both and I'm not convinced either has the superiority that posters here seem so assured of.

Parents aren't obligated to pay for a huge wedding.  And if they do, it's not unreasonable that they have some requests, particularly something innocuous as a handful of guests that they bride(s)/groom(s) will likely barely interact with.  If you want to crowbar 50 friends into 120 person venue, then it's a different sort of thing.  But everyone should try to be gracious and respectful that different groups might do things differently.  Some social circles would view it as a real slight to not be invited to the wedding of a close friend's child.

If you just want to give some money and not be involved, that can be nice too, but it's not like that can't send the wrong message as well.  I was in a bridal party with a bride that was more than a little hurt that the family wasn't all that interested in participating in the wedding. Her parents were divorced, not amicably and both didn't want anything more than to write a check and show up.

In answer, to OP's question: this will sort itself out when the time comes, but of course there will be other places for you to develop a social circle as your child ages, through your kid's activities, neighborhood groups, work, or your own hobbies.  If you don't have this and want it, leave the DCUM craziness and find some real people in the real world.

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