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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How do you value a good nanny’s work?  And a great housekeeper?  And a home manager?  And a personal chef?  That’s the roughly job of a SAHP - man or woman.  [/quote]

I don't agree with this way of looking at it.  All WOH/WAH parents still have to do housekeeping, home managing, and cooking the meals.  Some people outsource a lot of that but that is not limited to working parents, SAH parents outsource, too, if they have the funds.

So what it really comes down to is the difference between taking care of your children full-time vs. having someone assist with childcare while you work, usually for some part of the day.  That's really the only difference with a SAHP.[/quote]

NP here.  So you’re saying a SAHM has the nanny job.  I mean a really good college educated nanny’s job.  [/quote]

Essentially, yes.  My DH and I both work.  Between us we do all the household finances and management, cleaning, laundry, cooking etc.  Are you saying because we work that doesn't count, but for SAHMs it counts more?[/quote]

No, I’m saying the SAHP has the nanny job.  Nannies teach and care for the children.  Some handle child-related chores like kids laundry and cooking for children.

And nannies aren’t respected so SAHP wouldn’t be either.  [/quote]

I’m an Ivy educated SAHM. DH always tells me how his colleagues and friends tell him how lucky he is to have me as a wife. My kids are thriving and well rounded. Many of his friends complain about their wives lack of being involved. DH is proud of me and my efforts with our children. [/quote]

Your post made me sad for you.  You never said how you feel about what you’re doing - but mentioned twice how your husband feels about your worth.  You sound like Betty draper from Mad Men.  How you feel about you is what matters.

Please think about this, PP.  Your comment is heartbreaking.  [/quote]

I am at the beach with my kids right now in the middle of a pandemic. We are having a great time. Today was 88 degrees and sunny. Your heart does not have to break for me.

We ski when we want. We read. We bake. We go on stroller walks and hikes. I feel really fortunate that I am not working and home. I think it would be much more stressful to juggle kids and work in the middle of a pandemic.

Pp is the one who said a SAHM has a nanny’s job and not respected. [/quote]

I think the point many of us on this thread have been trying to make is that it is a problem in our society that childcare is not valued.  Both the SAHP and the nanny or any caretaker should be worthy of respect if they are good at their caretaking, because caretaking is important.

You, on the other hand, respond to all this by just bragging.  You may be a great mom to your kids, but you come off as another insecure woman who has to brag about her wealth to make herself feel good about herself.  It's annoying and gauche.[/quote]

I only responded that way because the pp said taking care of children is not respected. I said DH respected me. I respect myself. I feel I have high value and my time is valuable. Therefore, my caring for my children is both valuable and respectable.

I know it may not sound like it on an anonymous forum but DH and I are quite humble and down to earth. We come from humble beginnings. Both of us are loyal to a fault and have friends from all different backgrounds from various times in our past. I have friends who work out a lot or cook a lot. I just like to travel a lot. Half the time we travel with our friends so they also like to travel. [/quote]

You trotted out an ivy league degree and your wealth as a reason you feel you should be respected, not because you are a caregiver.  Give me a break. People who are down to earth don't brag like this to try to indicate they are worthy of respect.  If you were truly secure in yourself, you wouldn't go on like this.

And I'm a pp who advocates for giving more respect to all caregivers, but you are just too much.[/quote]

How would you know I was valuable if I didn’t?

I don’t tell people where I went to school in real life. I was just answering the thread.[/quote]

You honestly cannot just answer the thread by saying, my DH and I both value the work I do with our kids.  We are happy with our choice...or something like that without mentioning your degree and wealth?

For an Ivy Leaguer, you are pretty obtuse.[/quote]

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