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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I haven't seen a situation exactly like this, but I did catch my son being quite critical of a particular thing another kid was doing (e.g., "I can't pass you the ball, because whenever I do you always do X, Y, and Z.")  I had a talk with him and stressed that it wasn't helpful to say things like that - the coach will take care of whatever the perceived problem is with the kid, and his job was to just stay quiet about it and do his personal best.[/quote]

+1.

There was a situation on my son's team once when a new goalkeeper joined the team half way through the season and didn't have a great start.  The goalkeeper didn't help himself by clowning around and pretending he didn't care about his poor performance, and some of the kids started to express their frustration towards him.  I made sure that I walked away from the field with my son while the most vocal critic of the goalkeeper was walking close enough to hear, and asked my son
-  how he would feel if he joined a new team and let them down badly in his first couple of games
-  whether it was more likely the goalkpeeper actually felt that way inside and that his apparent behavior was "acting tough" to disguise his vulnerability, or that he really didn't care
-  whether the team was better off with the goalkeeper playing well or poorly
-  what behavior from his teammates was likely to help the goalkeeper regain confidence and improve, and what behavior might have the opposite effect.

Got good answers from my son, and the vocal teammate joined in the discussion and learned too.

If we had had a good coach I wouldn't have needed to do anything of course, but we had a terrible coach that year.[/quote]

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