Reply to I want to move due to resentment of neighbors and DH thinks I'm being crazy.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - therapist suggests I befriend them to "humanize" them instead of idolizing from a distance, but it hasn't worked. They have their own friends in our town and have accepted our invites, and then gone off somewhere afterward. It felt stilted and unnatural. [/quote]

I think your relationship status with the parents, the idolizing, the anxiety, could be very similar to your daughter's experience.  Is it possible that rather than a frenemy relationship, the neighbor girl is trying to be inclusive with your daughter and had best of intentions, but that neighbor girl is simply not your daughter's BFF, and neighbor girl is closer with her other playmate?  Or, like you said, your daughter is just shy in person, including during a group playdate?

Regardless of moving, I would fix the narrative your daughter might be hearing at home.  I would tell your daughter that the neighbor girl wants to be inclusive because you are neighbors, and that is a nice thing to include people.  And it is perfectly normal to not be BFF with your neighbor.  Who is best friends with an immediate neighbor?  That is so rare.  And that is ok.

Unless I am missing something intentionally nasty neighbor girl is doing.[/quote]

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