Reply to I’m unsure if my SO will be a good parent

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "I’m unsure if my SO will be a good parent"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So your real issue is that you don't think she's affectionate enough with YOU.

If you're not happy with your relationship, don't make up some bullshit reason about how she's not going to be a good mother. You have zero clue whether she is or not, and she actually sounds like she'd be great. Kind, flexible, and functional is huge.

Focus on whether YOU want to be married to her. Don't deflect this onto your imaginary future kids.  It's perfectly okay to break up with someone because you want more affection than you feel they offer or want to offer.  Just own it and call it what it is. [/quote]

+1000

I will add right now, OP you don't sound like very good dad or husband material. You have got a lot of growing up to do.[/quote]

How so?[/quote]

Well apparently you treated her like crap early in your relationship. And you have a little enough self-knowledge that you have taken your own desire for affection and projected it onto a hypothetical future child, and are seeing it as a defect in it your partner that she can’t meet these imagined child’s imagined needs.

Focus on being honest and communicating about your own needs. What you’re missing is that there is absolutely nothing wrong with her as you’ve described. She’s not defective in any way. She’s just different from you. If you’re not going to be happy with her as she is, there is zero reason for you to stay with her. It’s OK for you to need affection, and OK for her to not be affectionate. But it might mean that you guys are not a good match. Absolutely does not mean that she wouldn’t be a good mother, though, and taking your own needs and pretending they are universal is kind of concerning.[/quote]

Exactly this, and add you treated her badly, but seem surprised/or consider it a flaw that she had enough of you and toly ou about yourself. You may be a nice guy, she may not be right for you.  You've got some growing to do OP.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics