Reply to Husband’s work schedule—Does my opinion matter?

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[quote=Anonymous]Wait, op, your husband’s company is doing two identical projects?  Why?  Or, has he been offered a position as a team lead at a different and maybe competing company? Will more money be involved as in more take-home pay?  Given that you work in education, I am stunned at your poor word choices (later down in the thread you admit this) and your lack of clarity of the issue.  Maybe you really don’t know which speaks volumes about how you treat your husband.  I say this as a woman who’s husband works in a secure area, so I don’t know what he does all day. That being said, I’d certainly know if his company was running two duplicate efforts, or if he had been offered a position with more responsibility at a different company.

I want to be sympathetic to you, op, I’m a stay-at-home mom, and my teenager was the one who wore my ass out today.  My littler kids were a joy in comparison.

I took issue with your comments re your husband’s ego being stroked, every human on the planet wants and deserves praise for what they do.  I’m baffled that you can’t understand this given that you work for the school system, and those folks have more appreciation weeks, days, and awards then anybody.

I also noticed that you don’t want his company or to share experiences with him, you just want him home to give you a break.

Why would your husband want to come home to a woman who presents him as egotistical for expressing a healthy pride in his work, and who wants him around solely to get a break, a break from two elementary schoolers, who are between the pooping in their pants stage and the snotty teen stage?

My concern for your husband is that he would be doing more work for less money. That wouldn’t be acceptable to me.  I’d also worry that the late nights would devolve into later nights (just for a while) or weekends, (until the team is up to speed). Once a boss knows you can and will put up with that treatment, the only way to end it is to get a different job.

Still though, I might take those hours and working conditions if I didn’t want to be around my spouse, and I wouldn’t want to be around a spouse who simply wanted me as a chore mule and belittled work I was very proud of.

Think about what you want in terms of a husband and father for your kids.  You can’t hire either of those.

If you want a break or need/want help, hire someone.  There is nothing wrong at all with hiring someone to do legal work including taking care of as some would say “your own kids”.

And yes, you have every right to speak up about how you want your home life to look. Why you’d ask this is beyond me.   [/quote]

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