Reply to Colleges that provide good environment for kids with depression

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Please have your DC live at home while they are working on their issues. It’s not fair to a college roommate to be a dumping ground for kids with depression. That happened to my daughter- and I will never forget that family :(.[/quote]

Living at home could contribute to depression, depending on the kid.  They are entitled to try the college dorm experience.  There is no telling when or if depression will surface.  But you might consider OP whether your DC might prefer a single dorm room so they can have down time or quiet when they need it.

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Yeah there is a reason depression and anxiety has skyrocketed in the last 20 years and it isn’t electronics. It is the parenting. [/quote]

I heard someone who actually STUDIES this topic (not posts about it on DCUM) say that social media seemed to be contributing.

As am armchair observer, I have wondered if having no parent at home for so much of the day has an impact...but I don't know if that is true. I think we need to make kids believe nothing (no job or materials objects) matter to us more than them. [/quote]

No doubt social media plays a part of it.  Everything is fake.  But, I too think parents coddled and snowplowed for their kids.  I have to find the survey but they asked all of these 16 year olds, what do you think makes your parents happiest and over 80% said good grades.  None of them said their own happiness, confidence, health, etc...  It was really sad.  What we do to these kids in the hopes for a top college is insane.  The changes of the high school dynamic.  Tons of AP's, tutors, test prep, extra credit, year round travel sports,  is all the new rage.  Long gone are kids working part time, learning to become independent, socializing, making mistakes, learning street smarts, etc... I mean parents GPS track their kids now!!!  WTH.  Kids aren't allowed to be alone in the house until they are 16.  They get angry and stressed if there is a C on a report card.  They meet up with other moms and all they talk about is school, clubs, potential colleges, how good they are at sports, etc..  All the kids overhear.  They know their place and importance in their parents lives.  And parents help them achieve everything they possibly can and teens just let them because there is no choice.  Make it easier for them.  Then they send them off to college and said "good luck!"  Most kids don't even know how to be on their own for 2 hours let alone 24 hours. Some kids have never done their own laundry.  Made their own bed.  Shopped at a store and know unit prices.  Manage money or even have an account.  Forget how to travel on their own, or change a tire.  Or how to act without adult supervision.   They don't know that failing a college course is not the end of the world.  That learning mistakes happen all the time and overcoming obstacles is more important in the long run.    I mean schools are now having "adulting" courses because we as parents, are failing.  [/quote]

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