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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Did anyone realize quite late on in life that their mother was a narcissist?
It wasn't until my dad died and all her power over us disappeared that I found the definition of "narcissistic parent" online and she fit almost every category.
I felt sick and so stupid that I was in my mid-40s before I worked this out.[/quote]

Yes!  This is me exactly. I didn’t realize my mom was a Narcissist until my father died.

It really helped me to realize it was on me to set appropriate boundaries. I realized that I needed serious therapy and I’m just now getting over the trauma she caused me. She blamed every problem on me growing up and I’m just starting to break that habit.[/quote]

I am sorry about your fathers. How did their passing relate or connect to discovering your mothers are narcissists? [/quote]

A narcissistic parent by definition (someone posted a link page 1) can only function if the other parent fully enables them. My father (OP here) did that. He always took her side even when she was outrageously wrong. It meant she was "never wrong". And without him, she didn't have back up.[/quote]

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