Reply to Anyone regret sending their teen to inpatient rehab.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In patient rehabs and therapeutic boarding schools are most usually a bad choice parents with money make out of desperation.  I am not saying it might not work in a few cases, but I don't know of any.  The least best outcomes I have seen come out of kids taken away in the middle of the night and put in wilderness camps.  Usually on the advice of a consultant.

Dealing with a teen with problems large enough to consider these options is very hard work.  It seems so much easier to outsource it to these places.  But I firmly believe that having the family committed to having their child overcome the issues in a firm and kind, non-tough love way at home produces far better outcomes.

If you are lucky enough to have a trusted family member the child likes be in a position to take on your teen, that could work as well.[/quote]

Honestly, as someone who works with at risk kids, addiction and risky behavior is a nature/nurture issue where nurture is the most formative influence on what is happening with the child.  Families and parents are almost always the biggest component (90%) of the problem for children with addiction and/or high-risk behaviors.  Nature (i.e., heredity) is a small component but it is far out-weighed by nurture.

Keeping a child in a system that is broken will only work if the entire system works to fix the system's problem/s.  That means Mom, Dad, Sister/s, Brother/s, and kid all work together on the issues.  Most parents and families are not either willing or able to do the heavy lifting required.  Unfortunately this also means that when the child returns to the original environment failure is almost all but assured because the root causes haven't been fixed and the system that reinforces the problem is still in place.[/quote]

I think this is what “someone who works with at risk kids” wants to believe. I taught in an alternative school for many years and there many decent families with well-adjusted siblings who had one child struggle with addiction or cutting or mental health issues.[/quote]

+ 1

This attitude may reflect the population of the kids you happen to see, but your 90% number is not based on research. Plenty of kids self-medicate due to anxiety or depression, which is not due to poor parenting. [/quote]

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