Reply to Mil never wants to leave at bedtime

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]Anonymous wrote:
Its rude. Very rude.

While I agree with the let DH handle his own relatives position when it comes to coordination, gifts etc, in this situation I would tell her to leave at 9pm. Its your house and unless DH has some compelling need to keep his mother there past 9 just say something firmly. I'd let DH know in advance that we are telling MIL that she needs to leave by 9pm. If she is not out the door at 8:45 then you tell her it is time to go. DH should be smart enough to stop chatting.

If she still dawdles and hangs around looking at her phone then cancel the next week. Tell her that you and DH need to get up early the next morning and her late night visits do not work. If she protests and says that she will leave early then tell her OK maybe the following week but not this week. She needs to feel a consequence of being rude because she doesn't seem to care.

MIL isn't the rude one!

1) Kids are rude for not minding. 
2) DH is rude for not being involved with bedtime/bath time on a school night, and for not sticking to the plan (if indeed DH/OP agreed upon a certain point of departure); DH is rude for not working with OP to get on the same page. 
3) OP is actually kinda rude for placing blame on MIL rather than expecting her own kids to mind/expecting DH to be an involved parent and to be a proper host and see his guest out. OP is also kinda rude for blaming her MIL for *her own damn choice* of not just putting on PJs, going to bed, relaxing, and leaving DH to deal with final clean-up and locking up after MIL. GO TO YOUR ROOM AND EAT BON-BONS ALREADY!

MIL maybe needs to pick up on some social cues, but her host (her son) is clearly fine with her staying around. Maybe she's not fully reading the room, but her host is making it clear that she's welcome to stay!

Geesh. Again, I am never on Team MIL, but she's really not the worst offender in this scenario![/quote]

No it is the responsibility of the guest to leave when the hosts say goodbye. It is the responsibility of the guest to actually leave when she says she is going to leave. The DH is trying to be polite but MIL is is being rude and take advantage to hang around longer.

If your hosts have to set up a united front and be put in an uncomfortable situation to get your ass out the door then you are being rude. [/quote]

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