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[quote=Anonymous][quote=vtbigdog][quote=Anonymous]Your problem is asking for help on a board of people who mostly favor the wife, always.

She was wrong to make plans without asking you, even if your yearly plans were not in play.  She also knows you have annual plans, so she did this on purpose.  Find out why she acted that way.  Was she trying to make a point to your parents about them not formally extending an invitation?  Was she making a point to you about not wanting to go?  Without that information everything else is just noise.

Also, stop going to her family's so much if you don't want to.  She can go herself, just like you can go yourself to your parents'.[/quote]

Thank you for the excellent advice.

I use to go to her parents' less before kids. I love being with my kids so that it is sometimes why I just suck the craziness and go. [/quote]

Interesting that the only response you respond favorably to is the one that validates your feelings. Says all I need to know.
Here are the things I know from your posts:
-you don't make plans for your family. Your wife does. And she did.
-maybe it was a "standing weekend" for your dad's birthday. But, it's not a national holiday and he's an adult. Celebrate another day. Or if not, you go and take the kids. Tell your parents that "wife already had plans." Do not bad mouth her to parents.
-Your wife maybe was rude not to check first knowing the standing dates (or thereabouts). But the dates are ambiguous, as you acknowledge. If you wanted to reserved the weekend, YOU take the lead and block it off and  make the plans. You know that now so do it.

In short, all three parties here bear some fault in failing to properly communicate and just expecting/assuming others will do things. Learn from it, move on.[/quote]

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