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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]a gift is not something one gets to chose. There are two sides to a gift. The giver picks the item they want to gift for their own reasons including, at times, giving something that receiver may not chose for themselves. The other side of the gift giving processes is the receiver graciously receiving the gift. OP, you are lacking on both sides of this equation.

1. You don't pick your own gift.[b] I've given close family members things they might not have chosen for themselves and among the reasons I've done this, at times, is because I thought they might have a horizon expanding moment and learn the enjoy something new.[/b] Sure, your husband may have picked something he also enjoys but that does not mean his motivations are totally selfish. You, on the other hand, wanting him to "gift" only that which you, in advance, want is a selfish motivation. [b]You are taking away joy from the gift giver.[/b] Their joy is the experience of considering what to give someone else.

2. gracious acceptance of things we may not want is a gift to the giver and also a chance for us to grow individually.

I'm very surporsed that other people on DCUMS do not know and live by these principles because so many people on DCUMS are stay-at-homes or other types why contribute to their families by gift giving and sending thankyou notes, etc. [/quote]

You seem to misunderstand the point of a gift- it's not to make the giver happy. It's to make the recipient happy. Oh I am so glad you aren't a friend of mine, telling me how to expand my horizon. [/quote]

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