Reply to When your spouse seems to have conflict with everyone

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am reading this thread I started almost three years ago to the day and on the verge of tears. I am finally taking action. I just cannot believe I continue to live with this for as long as I did. FWIW the marriage therapist thinks she has BPD symptoms as well.[/quote]

Are you the same poster who started the thread on health and medicine about this? Did you have it deleted?

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. You sound thoughtful and your kids are lucky to have you. [/quote]

I started one yesterday and asked to have it deleted as the initial responses were not helpful and then one person started to put things back on me. I just can’t handle that right now. I am by no means perfect but this is a difficult situation.

I found this old thread when I used the search function and was shocked to remember I wrote it three years ago and not much has changed except some more distance (emotional) with my wife.

Ironically she asked for marriage therapy. Last two sessions I challenged some things and asserted myself and now she says the therapist is an idiot and she doesn’t think marriage counseling is helping us.

So I had a session alone and will continue to do so for a while.[/quote]

Op, my father is like this. He and my mom are still married, but I honestly don’t understand why. I am not sure how much a part of my life he would be if they divorced. I love my mother dearly and hurt for her when he cehaves badly toward her.

My dad has no friends and no community. If he didn’t have kids (and a wife), he would have no one at all who cares about him. He is not a bad/evil guy, just incredibly selfish and unwilling to admit to ever being wrong.

Regarding your original post in 2015 about your kids, all of us kids realized that how my father dealt with people/colleagues was bad, but didn’t really have another model for dealing w conflict. Luckily we have all found other role models since then, and we are not like him.

His behavior has impacted my marriage and trust for men. I am 10 years happily married, and I truly love my DH, but we did therapy several times during the early years.

GL.[/quote]

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