Reply to Two family weddings abroad, two months apart....

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Out of curiosity, did your DH attend his cousin's previous wedding(s)?  If he didn't go to them before (which sounds possible if you're not sure how many times cousin has been married) then it seems reasonable to not be worried about making it to this destination wedding.[/quote]

OP here.  See, I had not considered questions like this one, so thank you.  No, DH did not attend the other weddings, and usually does not attend his cousins' weddings, in general. My side seems to be a closer family, in general, more history and we have a lot to talk about.  DH's family, not so much.  His siblings and parents and their families live close, and we hardly see them.  Dh's neices and nephews are much older than our children, and there is not a lot of interest. They do a once a year week long thing, and DH attends a few days to be polite, but for the most part, the nephews/nieces/ILs do not attend, and attendance falls each year.  My impression is that DH's family is not all that interested in each other, maybe they show some attention to the mom because of her age, but that is just my impression.  The few times someone has visited out of state, they seem to pass right by our house. I needed to hear from outside sources, I did not want to taint anyone's opinion.  I just want to do the right thing, given the circumstances. [/quote]

DP.  In all of this, you have not mentioned what your husband wants to do.  What does he want?  And what does he think the family repercussions would be if he didn't attend the wedding on his side?  I'm the one who posted the point about cultural issues where family events are about reunions and getting the family together and showing off children, etc.  If he thinks that there may be some negative feedback in the future to him or your children for not attending, then you need to include that in your decision.  You've mentioned how much negative feedback you'll get from your family over not going or not bringing your children.  What about the same feedback from his family for the same?  I would think that if you can at all afford it, the best idea is that you go to your family wedding with the kids and then he goes to his family wedding with the kids.  I know it's expensive, but at least you'll save on one adult ticket for each trip.  Also, if the person staying home can do some other work, even something like driving for Uber, then you might be able to make up cost of the kids tickets.  I would guess that the kids will not cost extra for housing since they can share a room with you that you would already be paying for.[/quote]

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