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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You all go to the first wedding. DH can go solo (or not) to the second. Done.[/quote]

this[/quote]

I agree.  There are compelling reasons to go to the first wedding.  If your husband wants to go to the destination wedding, he can go.  If he doesn't even really want to go, then it's not on you.  If your MIL gives you grief, refer her to your husband.  She might well try to make you the bad guy, but it sounds like she does this anyway, so who cares?  [/quote]

OP here.  This is how I am thinking - damned if I do, damned if I don't - right?  So, I may as well be with the people who actually want us there (not just for bragging rights), and be with the people I am actually close to.  I should tell you, the other ILs on DH's side are refusing to go, and MIL has not said boo about that.  It is okay for them to have to work, but not me.  I don't think the ILs really care that much for MIL, and they don't know the cousins at all. The one time we met DH's cousins recently, they practically ignored us, which I thought was weird, considering we were meeting them for the first time.  I thought it was rude, but I want to be sure I am making a practical decision, not an emotional decision. [/quote]

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