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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Only been separated a month, see each other a few times a week at exchanges for the kids. I text her wanting to talk about the marriage and be a better husband, but she doesn't think I can change. No abuse, no cheating, no major financial issues. She just doesn't trust that any changes I may make will be permanent. I admittedly have some trust issues after some bad things as a kid, but I've mostly put them behind me.

I miss her. I miss talking to her, holding hands, doing things as a family. The new normal sucks. I ask her about her day and she gets mad thinking I'm snooping into what she's doing.

I let her down by getting anxious over marital issues. Instead of focusing on myself, I projected onto her thinking she was seeing someone. It made things worse. She won't forgive me. It was wholly unattractive, and I realized my issue too late.

I'm hoping maybe some time away and space will cause her to reevaluate, but I'm not sure. I still love her immensely and I loved our family. How do I gain her trust again? How do I show her I can be supportive of her? I'm willing to do just about anything for her and the kids. I'm lost now.[/quote]

OP, I think this post is so beautiful. Hitting lows in our life and marriages are never easy. It sounds like the love between the two of you is real.

Give her space. Be consistent in your actions with her. Show her your commitment to your new lifestyle by simply living it. Try not to "win her back" with any type of gesture. My mother HATED when my father continued to send flowers on Mother's Day/Anniversary/Birthday but as I child I thought it was a sweet gesture, DONT DO THAT.

Be available for when she comes around. You'll know when that moment is, you know her. In my experience, all I wanted from my husband at times was to prop me back up whenever I fall over, and let me know how important I am to him. When he refused, emotionally I withdrew and voluntarily gave up. I don't know how we got back on track but it wasn't with anything extreme, just trying to be better  versions of our selves.

She may be happier without you right now, but I promise that feeling won't be around forever, Stay consistent and she'll seek you out when she's in a moment of need. That's when you'll get your chance to win her back.[/quote]

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