Reply to Do parents/in laws have any right to expect an effort at family togetherness?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I [b]am from Europe and I find these attitudes towards parents, ILS here very unusual. Family is family[/b], when I married my DH's family became my family, they are white bread American type of family, but I realized that I didn't become their family. I think it goes both ways. My DH's grandmother asked my SIL and me, DH was working overseas at the time, which of their nice wooden furniture(small pieces like stools and such) would we like to get as they were getting older. SIL answered and I said, I don't know, I will ask DH, but I think he really likes the small stool. I was given a lecture by SIL(my age) about it not being my place. When MIL died I was the only one that went out of my way to cook for FIL and help, and when I asked, one day!  if he likes this kind of stew that I prepared that day, that he will tell me after he eats it. This was after months of cooking for him. I am the one who tells DH to let go of annoying things his family does. So, I don't know, it seems to me it goes both ways. In Europe, in my family, we know traditions and we don't make a fuss about it. Parents do for us, and we do for them. I have no idea if this this just my country, probably there are many differences in every country in the world, in every family in the world. And my ILS might be just as unusual in the US compared to many other US families.[/quote]

Maybe that's why Europeans are marrying less and having fewer children.[/quote]

I'm not from Europe but I agree with you. There seems to have been a major change in attitudes somewhere in the last 25 years, resulting in an attitude, manifested here, that family is an outmoded concept.[/quote]

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