Reply to Drama over space heater-want divorce

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Drama over space heater-want divorce "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP, I have a very similar situation, and so I'm going to try to give some advice.
I think my DH is especially unhelpful on these sorts of things because he feels like as a guy, he should know the answers and be able to fix this stuff, but he doesn't have that skill set, so he feels like a failure as a man, etc., etc.  (I think it's analogous to how some women feel when they can't breast-feed or something like that -- like it reflects on them as a woman.) I think a lot of guys also just won't read up on safety stuff -- it's like the old joke about not asking for directions when they are lost.  I can't explain it, but for some guys that just seems to be true.

It's incredibly aggravating.  Would I be justified in saying "Forget it -- you need to grow up and learn to deal with things you don't like to deal with."? Yes, I would.  Would it be successful in getting him to change his behavior?  No, it would not.  Do I want to be a divorced single mom?  No, I do not.  So I mostly deal with that stuff myself, and then try to find stuff to outsource to him that does not trigger the male guilt complex.  If I have a strong view on how something should be handled, I just handle it so that we're not in a situation where I'm criticizing the decision that he made.  The stuff that I'm ambivalent about, I outsource to him.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics