Reply to Boy is pursuing my DD and won't leave her alone

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Reply to "Boy is pursuing my DD and won't leave her alone"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I disagree with those saying you need to step in ASAP.  Your daughter will deal with this shit again and again.  Is she going to have her daddy come intimidate her tinder dates so they don't try anything?  No.  The sad truth is that she will need the skillset to say "No" and mean it.  BUT, that IS a skillset and I think you need to talk that through with her clearly.

1) She needs to document his messages.  A day or two of 10 messages per day documented is plenty to show that he was overly involved in messaging her.

2) She needs to set him a Snapchat message (so that it is private and not embarrassing for him, which might cause him to escalate, but she does not need to talk to him privately in person), and save her message before sending (so that she can demonstrate that she clearly asked him to back off on X date), where she says clearly and explicitly.  "I am not interested in you and you are making me uncomfortable.  Do not approach me again online or in person."

3) She needs to block him on Snapchat.

4) She needs to tell SOMEONE at the school.  This can be their shared teacher, a guidance counselor or the principal or VP, but she needs to tell someone in a position of authority that this person has crossed some lines and that she has clearly asked him not to contact her again.  The point here is for her to learn that you get someone involved, because if he decides to escalate after she blocks him, it will be in the physical space of the school, and she will need backup.  Explain that telling them means that she has the credibility to come to them if/when he does become a physical threat.

A big problem for a lot of women in these situations is failure to document, which leads to them being ignored or not believed.  So she needs to document and put it on the record with someone in authority.

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+1[/quote]

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